Job: Midwife Sonographer
Children: Chester, 9 months
What’s the hardest thing about being a parent?
Wanting to do the best job in the world and so frequently doubting myself. There is so much advice out there about how to do everything, but at the end of the day I’ve learnt to trust my gut and do it our way. Everyday with my babe is a learning curve and I’m definitely learning on the job, but thankfully the cliche is true and it is the bloody best job in the world! So the 24 shifts and my new grey hairs and the 3am panicked google searches and all the food I make being thrown around the kitchen is allllll worth it.
Do you have any secret or tried and tested activities to do with your child?
Chester has a favourite song, which was a song we played to him and sung to him a lot as a newborn. Now whenever he is having a meltdown we can play it and it’s like a switch flicks and he is INSTANTLY calm. Life saving!!!!
How can someone best help a friend who has just had a baby?
Always bring snacks!
The early days just seemed to disappear in a fog of feeding and bum changing and sleep deprivation and somehow the idea of cooking anything that wasn’t toast seemed near impossible. The best gift we received was a week of really fancy ready-meals and it was the absolute bomb (thanks Alys!). Great friends are the ones who send lots of supportive messages and do lots of baking and make the cups of tea when they come and visit!
What would you do with a child-free hour?
Sleep!!!! Eat with two hands?! Or if I was really lucky get a massage to work out my many, many back knots from carrying about my giant baby.
Do you have any advice for other mums or anyone planning on having a child?
I put way to much pressure on myself about my birth. Being a midwife meant I’d seen it all, so I knew how I wanted it to go down. Also, there is so much focus in society at the moment on having the ‘perfect’ birth that you can loose sight of the fact all that really matters is that you are safe and supported and cared for and that the baby arrives safely. I ended up so focused in my mind that I wanted my birth to be a quick one in the birthing pool with no pain relief (spoiler it absolutely was not). In retrospect I set extremely high expectations for my body and when things didn’t go to ‘plan’ I stupidly felt it had let me down. I kindly overlooked the fact I had grown an (AMAZING) healthy baby who had arrived in the world safely, and ultimately that’s all that matters! So don’t put pressure on yourself about any of it! Focus on the bigger picture, making a baby and growing your baby and then however you birth your baby, you are a champion as no way is easier than the other. At the end of it all your lovely little baby is all you ever wanted anyway.
Jade and Chester.